Question Of Friendship

For the first time in my life I was shut off by a good friend—yes, she remains to be a good friend because I still love her dearly despite of her choice of staying away from me for until I don’t know when. I felt unfair but in times like this I guess all I need to be is to remain a friend and a friend knows how to understand even if in times of confusions!

I’ve known her for only couple of years but we already shared so much—family, love, career—life in general. She’s already part of my family just like our other friends. I can say that we’ve been together at the most terrible times of our beings. It’s the reason why I guess it’s painful for me when she decided to alienate herself. I had a little adjustment for quite some time not to be with her or just talk to her once in awhile when we used to have each other 24 hours a day. We have a great friendship and I know from my heart that I remain to be her friend.

Maybe I just have to admit that even if we’re close, there are some certain things that she wanted to keep on her own—well, I have some things too that she doesn’t know I guess.

I worry about her sometimes but I know she’s old enough to take good care of herself. I worry about her kids but I know she is a good mother to handle things. I’m very excited to share with her what’s happening with me lately but I guess I have this pride too of giving her what she wants without hearing any word from me.

It’s just still a big question mark for me thinking how someone can shut off her friends who were with her in all the bad times — not to count anymore the good times. All I know now is she has her own big reasons and I hope it’s really worth it.

She’s in-love! That’s the reason but I can’t understand why she needs to distance herself from us when there’s nothing wrong to be in-love and having your friends with you as well. I just hope the guy is not the one who asked her to stay away from us because that is very selfish of him.

Sometimes I thought of also doing the same thing—I mean, I’m not in-love right now but alienating myself. I wanted to live on my own and worry about no one. I can’t! Even if I’m already pissed of with some friends who thinks it’s my responsibility to call them once in awhile—I cannot shut them off. I maybe don’t need them now but the thought of they need me to be there is I guess my reasons why even though I sometimes enjoying my tranquility, my mobile is still available 24 hours for these friends.

Still, I respect my good friend Esabela because as I’ve said she has her own reasons. It maybe a little unfair but I guess I would be unfair as well if I won’t give her the space she needs. If things goes wrong—she knows where to find me. I am maybe questioning the friendship sometimes but I guess I cannot force anyone to give it to me because..FRIENDSHIP IS A GIFT!